So...2012. Hi. It's been a while. I have two jobs now. One with Frito Lay that Matthew got me, and still with Sawyer. But now at this time I have been promoted to a position of authority. I am now in charge of hiring and training individuals. Right now I am feeling less stressed for a few days, before I realize I need to get new people into the store to get to interviewing and training everyone to get through the busy season.
In other news, I am at the local college and not really enjoying it all that much. School just isn't that interesting or thrilling to me. I need to get onto working on my main projects for this semester, so I am probably going to try and get a lot of them done with week. Life can just be so stressful!
Now onto real life, the good part of life. Still with Matthew, two years strong and then some. I love him. It's nice to know you can just spend an entire day with someone and not actually have to do anything. That talking along and being together is enough entertainment.
I mentioned the other day how lonely I get without him, and wished we lived together...I think he is now highly considering getting a place to move out. Actually I am sure if I said ok let's do it he would go out apartment searching that day. It's not that I don't wish to live with him, it's just that I am so tight with my money I'd hate to go off and spend it. I'd ideally wish our parents, mainly mine, would be okay if we spent more time at each others houses. This including over night stays and things like that.
I have a sneaking feeling he is going to propose soon as well...something he keeps saying about saving his finances for something...very vague and lingering in such a way that makes me wonder what the hell he is saving for right now. But maybe I am wrong.
He knows now that he has to ask my parents first. If anytime would I wish to be a fly on the wall would be during that conversation. I would never wish that upon anyone, but I think it would be a noble and respectable thing for Matthew to do.
Off to my next class, I wish I had a pen pal. I used to email my friend Jessie back and fourth, but she is now too busy to be a friend to me, so now I just linger for someone to communicate with in such a way. Like the casual, take a half hour everyday to type an email about your day or anything bothering you. It's relaxing and soothing to take that time to do something for yourself, it's like therapy you can do yourself.
Guess since I have no one to type to, I just type to a blank audience. Shame I never hear their opinion. Or responses. . .
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Friday, October 29, 2010
Considering My Future
I wonder why I shall go in the next year. I guess I will follow what my parents planned for me, at least for the next two years. Go to the community college for the next two years and get some of my basics out of the way at a far cheaper rate. Which means I could probably still keep my job at the SGC while going to school. Someday I think this would be a good idea, but at the same time I know on those bad days it will cause me a lot of stress.
I worry about my Matthew a lot, since his works fucks him over left and right, which blows for him and makes me worry. I wish society wasn't such a shit hole when it comes to trying to work and do your job, people above you continue to shit on you and you feel that someday if you make it to the top you could fix it, but seems like an endless cycle of being stuck under the gigantic shit pile of society. I'd love to somehow make Matthew's dreams come true, have him get transferred, and be able to go to school.
I think I would like to get a business degree, to somehow rise above these stupid corporations that no longer understand what it's like to work on the floor level anymore, and make them see what it's like, and that happier employee's mean more income and higher numbers, so at the end of the day everyone wins. From the highest level to the basement, everyone wins.
I've been told I go on power trips, however I really don't know if I do. I believe it's more of a misunderstanding. Most people understand that I don't sugar coat things, if I believe something, I am most likely going to call it out. So when I'm working, I will end my statements with a period and not a kind question mark. See where I work I am the youngest one, which causes issues. Not many people want to listen to someone younger than them, even if the fact is they know more on a subject than themselves. So to have someone follow orders or even listen to you, one has to command their respect. I am much "kinder" to those who show me respect already, but I've found if they wish me to respect them, they must first show that they understand I know what I speak of and am not a complete idiot, as they believe.
Hmm I really just am unsure of what tomorrow will bring for me. I guess that's how it is with a lot of people. Last night I was chatting with my ex boyfriend Adam, and he had always been set on becoming a pharmacist and now that he is working in a lab, he's discovered he hates it. I would have never expected that from him, but I guess no one is ever entirely sure of what they want until they finally get there and try it out. Just for me I have no idea really what I want to try out first. If I actually had a following on my blog I would ask you all for advice to where I should start, but since I don't I will ask of my mind to consider different options for me.
Today marks 9 months with Matthew. He means a lot to me, for sure more than anyone else in my past. I hope things continue to go well, because in a way I really feel we are meant to be together forever.
I wish I had the energy to clean my bedroom out, and clean my car while the weather is still nice. But most of all I wish I had the brain power right now to do all my late assignments for Monday and study for an AP Calc test that I most likely will bomb, since it's over a chapter I barely have a grasp on at all. I do know one thing about my future, I hope I'm not in a job that requires Calc. It's such a silly math, I honestly see no practicality to it unless you become a math teacher to teach the subject!
Well I am going to see how far my movie has loaded, and if it get's clogged up I shall return to this page to write more.
(Five Minutes Later...)
Yeah....seems it didn't load very far...I'm off to the kitchen to find some food. Until next time
I worry about my Matthew a lot, since his works fucks him over left and right, which blows for him and makes me worry. I wish society wasn't such a shit hole when it comes to trying to work and do your job, people above you continue to shit on you and you feel that someday if you make it to the top you could fix it, but seems like an endless cycle of being stuck under the gigantic shit pile of society. I'd love to somehow make Matthew's dreams come true, have him get transferred, and be able to go to school.
I think I would like to get a business degree, to somehow rise above these stupid corporations that no longer understand what it's like to work on the floor level anymore, and make them see what it's like, and that happier employee's mean more income and higher numbers, so at the end of the day everyone wins. From the highest level to the basement, everyone wins.
I've been told I go on power trips, however I really don't know if I do. I believe it's more of a misunderstanding. Most people understand that I don't sugar coat things, if I believe something, I am most likely going to call it out. So when I'm working, I will end my statements with a period and not a kind question mark. See where I work I am the youngest one, which causes issues. Not many people want to listen to someone younger than them, even if the fact is they know more on a subject than themselves. So to have someone follow orders or even listen to you, one has to command their respect. I am much "kinder" to those who show me respect already, but I've found if they wish me to respect them, they must first show that they understand I know what I speak of and am not a complete idiot, as they believe.
Hmm I really just am unsure of what tomorrow will bring for me. I guess that's how it is with a lot of people. Last night I was chatting with my ex boyfriend Adam, and he had always been set on becoming a pharmacist and now that he is working in a lab, he's discovered he hates it. I would have never expected that from him, but I guess no one is ever entirely sure of what they want until they finally get there and try it out. Just for me I have no idea really what I want to try out first. If I actually had a following on my blog I would ask you all for advice to where I should start, but since I don't I will ask of my mind to consider different options for me.
Today marks 9 months with Matthew. He means a lot to me, for sure more than anyone else in my past. I hope things continue to go well, because in a way I really feel we are meant to be together forever.
I wish I had the energy to clean my bedroom out, and clean my car while the weather is still nice. But most of all I wish I had the brain power right now to do all my late assignments for Monday and study for an AP Calc test that I most likely will bomb, since it's over a chapter I barely have a grasp on at all. I do know one thing about my future, I hope I'm not in a job that requires Calc. It's such a silly math, I honestly see no practicality to it unless you become a math teacher to teach the subject!
Well I am going to see how far my movie has loaded, and if it get's clogged up I shall return to this page to write more.
(Five Minutes Later...)
Yeah....seems it didn't load very far...I'm off to the kitchen to find some food. Until next time
Thursday, September 23, 2010
It's Been A While
The title speaks the truth, it has been a while.
Life has been decent to me other than the fact I've been home sick from school and work the last three days. Last year I remember how many days I would just dodge out from school because it was getting too hard from me, this year I'm actually sick. Thankfully I am feeling much better, and tomorrow is Friday so I plan to get all my missing assignments and somehow power through them this weekend, then Monday will start the week off with a bit more relaxing.
So to try and play catchup... work was great, I miss it being back in school. Yes a lot of the time I bitch about it, but in the end I love that place and only wish to make it better. Sometimes I hate the people I work with and sometimes I hate the customers, but in the end without either of them it wouldn't exist. People are finally starting to respect me I feel, at least the managers. I think they finally realize they ought to treat me well since I do my job right, and they sort of need to keep at least some of their employees content.
My family and I are actually getting along decently. It seems I will be going to the local community college for the first two years after I graduate. Seems smart actually, it's wise way to save some cash, and that way I can still keep my job and earn some extra cash before I go away.
I've been missing my friends a lot lately. It's kinda nice to be back in school because I get to hang out with the few friends in my grade I have left, and it's nice to see some familiar faces closer in my age. At the same time it sort of sucks, since so many of my closest friends are away at different schools. I'm looking forward to the holidays when they will come back home for a while. My girlfriend is coming home soon so I hope school and work allow me to see her and possibly spend the night...I miss her a lot, so I just replace hanging out with her with visits to her mother. I think I might be a mom hoe...I can't help it!
My other close guy friend is coming home for Thansgiving, it's been a long time since I've seen him last. After my one breakup he probably was my best guy friend.
Also then Marquise is going to be home for Christmas. I miss him dearly too since he's ended up turning into my older over protective brother.
I began this post several weeks ago it seems...and just never got around to finishing it.
I still have not gotten around to finishing it, but I feel I should post this before I decide not to, at one point I believed these words to have importance. So here they are.
Life has been decent to me other than the fact I've been home sick from school and work the last three days. Last year I remember how many days I would just dodge out from school because it was getting too hard from me, this year I'm actually sick. Thankfully I am feeling much better, and tomorrow is Friday so I plan to get all my missing assignments and somehow power through them this weekend, then Monday will start the week off with a bit more relaxing.
So to try and play catchup... work was great, I miss it being back in school. Yes a lot of the time I bitch about it, but in the end I love that place and only wish to make it better. Sometimes I hate the people I work with and sometimes I hate the customers, but in the end without either of them it wouldn't exist. People are finally starting to respect me I feel, at least the managers. I think they finally realize they ought to treat me well since I do my job right, and they sort of need to keep at least some of their employees content.
My family and I are actually getting along decently. It seems I will be going to the local community college for the first two years after I graduate. Seems smart actually, it's wise way to save some cash, and that way I can still keep my job and earn some extra cash before I go away.
I've been missing my friends a lot lately. It's kinda nice to be back in school because I get to hang out with the few friends in my grade I have left, and it's nice to see some familiar faces closer in my age. At the same time it sort of sucks, since so many of my closest friends are away at different schools. I'm looking forward to the holidays when they will come back home for a while. My girlfriend is coming home soon so I hope school and work allow me to see her and possibly spend the night...I miss her a lot, so I just replace hanging out with her with visits to her mother. I think I might be a mom hoe...I can't help it!
My other close guy friend is coming home for Thansgiving, it's been a long time since I've seen him last. After my one breakup he probably was my best guy friend.
Also then Marquise is going to be home for Christmas. I miss him dearly too since he's ended up turning into my older over protective brother.
I began this post several weeks ago it seems...and just never got around to finishing it.
I still have not gotten around to finishing it, but I feel I should post this before I decide not to, at one point I believed these words to have importance. So here they are.
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Yesterday
Yesterday I guess everything came to a boiling point so to speak inside of me. After school I met up with my Matthew in the Martins parking lot and he came with me when I went on the search for a strapless bra to wear under my hot pink strapless prom dress. But after that I really just wanted to see him, lately I have been having a lot of crap going on inside of me. Things I don't even fully understand, so its clearly almost impossible for me to spell these sorts of things out in a blog, but I feel it will give me some sort of comfort or understanding to see the words typed out with the contrast of black on white.
So we drove around for a spell, we were in The Cougar, and no place to really go. So I'd drive about and park in a parking lot along the beach or in a playground parking lot. And we did a little talking and stuff. Just easy stuff talking about this and that and Matthew kept asking me who I was texting and he took away my cell phone saying he wouldnt give me back my phone until I told him. I hate saying shit a loud like that because I was texting Matt D (some friend of my third cousins who gave me his number one evening at work, the only reason I texted Matt D in the first place was to get my third cousins number to ask something dealing with work....) Anyway Matt D and myself were discussing how I was trying to hook him up with a female that I know, but I guess it was failing horrible. I was also texting Jessie B. about prom plans and stuff, and I know that Jessica dislikes Matthew's age so I kinda just try to avoid her as a topic of interest. I didn't mean to make it seem like I was hiding something, rather it was the opposite. I'd rather he have read the messages and not just have known the names of whom I was texting because that would have made things seem as if I was going behind his back, when I wasn't.
So we left that parking lot and moved to the playground parking lot since I wasn't ready to drop him back off at his car and say goodbye. I've been in such a fog lately and I wish I knew what I could say to explain this, maybe it's this stupid paper we have to write that brings up old memories and makes me drift to a different time than 2010. But when we finally pulled next to his vehicle he sat Mr Bubbles in between the two seats, since it was sitting on his lap. And usually we would just say our goodbyes and what not and I'd go home to do my homework as he would go home and relax on his day off. But instead I was holding back tears since I turned into Martins parking lot and I grabbed my teddy bear for comfort. I think he realized that something was wrong when I was holding my bear and not making eye contact with him, and then the tears started to roll down my face. I wished at the time that I had held the tears back long enough for him to get into his own car, but now I am glad he was there. He held me and kept asking what was wrong; but I honestly dont have a good answer to tell him. I wish I did, if I knew what was wrong he'd be one of the first people I would tell.
He told me that I should go home and rest, shut myself off from my mother and father, and get something to eat. He was right of course but by the time I got home I really just wanted to sit and talk it out with whomever would listen because I just needed an ear, maybe some thoughtful insight from another side.
It was bad I have to admit, I was scared to be so weak in front of him. But now I feel better with him than ever before because I know how difficult it is to not know whats going on but he handled it very impressively. I miss him a lot, every time we see each other it makes all the crap of the day melt away in to the corners of my mind. But to say goodbye...to say goodbye to him breaks my heart nearly every time. I dont think he knows how much he means to me. How much I really really care about him. He's my rock through the thick and the thin I hope he'll always be by my side.
I guess this entry really just turned into me admitting to the world in my own little way how I really feel about Matthew. I think it's great how (I think?) we both know how the other feels about each other even though we've never said it out right. It's an understanding. And when we lay next to each other, I just want to be closer. I want to be so close even though it seems impossible to be physically closer. It's mental as well, I want to crawl into his head and have him be in my head. I want to become one with him and never leave his side. He's my everything. I just want to be with him forever.
So we drove around for a spell, we were in The Cougar, and no place to really go. So I'd drive about and park in a parking lot along the beach or in a playground parking lot. And we did a little talking and stuff. Just easy stuff talking about this and that and Matthew kept asking me who I was texting and he took away my cell phone saying he wouldnt give me back my phone until I told him. I hate saying shit a loud like that because I was texting Matt D (some friend of my third cousins who gave me his number one evening at work, the only reason I texted Matt D in the first place was to get my third cousins number to ask something dealing with work....) Anyway Matt D and myself were discussing how I was trying to hook him up with a female that I know, but I guess it was failing horrible. I was also texting Jessie B. about prom plans and stuff, and I know that Jessica dislikes Matthew's age so I kinda just try to avoid her as a topic of interest. I didn't mean to make it seem like I was hiding something, rather it was the opposite. I'd rather he have read the messages and not just have known the names of whom I was texting because that would have made things seem as if I was going behind his back, when I wasn't.
So we left that parking lot and moved to the playground parking lot since I wasn't ready to drop him back off at his car and say goodbye. I've been in such a fog lately and I wish I knew what I could say to explain this, maybe it's this stupid paper we have to write that brings up old memories and makes me drift to a different time than 2010. But when we finally pulled next to his vehicle he sat Mr Bubbles in between the two seats, since it was sitting on his lap. And usually we would just say our goodbyes and what not and I'd go home to do my homework as he would go home and relax on his day off. But instead I was holding back tears since I turned into Martins parking lot and I grabbed my teddy bear for comfort. I think he realized that something was wrong when I was holding my bear and not making eye contact with him, and then the tears started to roll down my face. I wished at the time that I had held the tears back long enough for him to get into his own car, but now I am glad he was there. He held me and kept asking what was wrong; but I honestly dont have a good answer to tell him. I wish I did, if I knew what was wrong he'd be one of the first people I would tell.
He told me that I should go home and rest, shut myself off from my mother and father, and get something to eat. He was right of course but by the time I got home I really just wanted to sit and talk it out with whomever would listen because I just needed an ear, maybe some thoughtful insight from another side.
It was bad I have to admit, I was scared to be so weak in front of him. But now I feel better with him than ever before because I know how difficult it is to not know whats going on but he handled it very impressively. I miss him a lot, every time we see each other it makes all the crap of the day melt away in to the corners of my mind. But to say goodbye...to say goodbye to him breaks my heart nearly every time. I dont think he knows how much he means to me. How much I really really care about him. He's my rock through the thick and the thin I hope he'll always be by my side.
I guess this entry really just turned into me admitting to the world in my own little way how I really feel about Matthew. I think it's great how (I think?) we both know how the other feels about each other even though we've never said it out right. It's an understanding. And when we lay next to each other, I just want to be closer. I want to be so close even though it seems impossible to be physically closer. It's mental as well, I want to crawl into his head and have him be in my head. I want to become one with him and never leave his side. He's my everything. I just want to be with him forever.
Saturday, April 3, 2010
[[Gotta Come Up With A Title]]
It's already April really? Guess time moves quickly when looking back onto a crazy couple of months. I guess January was the last time I really posted anything of useful information. Since then a few things have changed in my life but overall it's just filled with school and family stress.
Work is finally picking up with the better weather starting. Meaning soon I shall ask for consideration for a pay increase.
The Cougar is in the shop, hopefully getting it's starter replaced so I can have my car back Monday or Tuesday to not be stranded on my Spring Break.
My birthday was last week sometime, I believe it was Thursday. As usual my father couldn't even be polite to me on my birthday, and we had a great fight. Went out to dinner in Michigan City, went home and opened my gift from them of $100 and a belt.
My friend Katlyn got me an incense burner and some cones and sticks.
My Aunt got me a great red scarf and an awesome black shirt.
Grandparents got me some clothing, and such items.
My grandmother gave me $100.
My sister bought her and myself tickets to see the band U2 in concert this June.
But my man would take the cake on best birthday gift this year...
He bought me a replacement Ipod for the one I recently lost possession of; I now am the owner of a gun metal grey, 160gig Ipod classic :-)
Oh...yes new man officially in my life; Matthew.
As I was texting Marquise tonight seems I find myself thinking of how confusing things can be. How I never seem to fit in with my own age group, and that one minute I am able to mesh completely with a group of older people. Then the next I feel myself being set over in the corner. Seems it's been this way for a while, and yet I am only know sure of it. Only a few times do I ever truly feel as if I belong. That being when I am with Marquise, or Matthew, talking to Luke, and a few other people. Seems Marquise has a similar issue and finds comfort in myself, Matthew, and Luke as well. Perhaps I will find others like them and myself. But that is for time to tell, not myself.
Another confusing topic...where am I to go with school...what am I to do with myself? So many people say I should go into some sort of art...others say I should go into makeup (that of movies and such), and others yet say I have to figure it out for myself. Now that is the issue, school is really not my cup of tea, so just stumbling through it to end up changing my mind is not an option I wish to take.
I have told many I plan to become a bartender, and perhaps a massage therapist to create decent revenue until I makeup my mind further, but yet I am undecided. I hope to find a job where I can be near my friends and make enough money to support myself and take care of those who I care about. Guess a lot of people have that familiar dream fall apart before their eyes.
My sister wishes to use her computer, and her apartment means her rules. So I'll try and update this soon, adding a proper title and a music video of course. Farewell for now.
[[Gotta Come Up With A Movie Clip]]
Work is finally picking up with the better weather starting. Meaning soon I shall ask for consideration for a pay increase.
The Cougar is in the shop, hopefully getting it's starter replaced so I can have my car back Monday or Tuesday to not be stranded on my Spring Break.
My birthday was last week sometime, I believe it was Thursday. As usual my father couldn't even be polite to me on my birthday, and we had a great fight. Went out to dinner in Michigan City, went home and opened my gift from them of $100 and a belt.
My friend Katlyn got me an incense burner and some cones and sticks.
My Aunt got me a great red scarf and an awesome black shirt.
Grandparents got me some clothing, and such items.
My grandmother gave me $100.
My sister bought her and myself tickets to see the band U2 in concert this June.
But my man would take the cake on best birthday gift this year...
He bought me a replacement Ipod for the one I recently lost possession of; I now am the owner of a gun metal grey, 160gig Ipod classic :-)
Oh...yes new man officially in my life; Matthew.
As I was texting Marquise tonight seems I find myself thinking of how confusing things can be. How I never seem to fit in with my own age group, and that one minute I am able to mesh completely with a group of older people. Then the next I feel myself being set over in the corner. Seems it's been this way for a while, and yet I am only know sure of it. Only a few times do I ever truly feel as if I belong. That being when I am with Marquise, or Matthew, talking to Luke, and a few other people. Seems Marquise has a similar issue and finds comfort in myself, Matthew, and Luke as well. Perhaps I will find others like them and myself. But that is for time to tell, not myself.
Another confusing topic...where am I to go with school...what am I to do with myself? So many people say I should go into some sort of art...others say I should go into makeup (that of movies and such), and others yet say I have to figure it out for myself. Now that is the issue, school is really not my cup of tea, so just stumbling through it to end up changing my mind is not an option I wish to take.
I have told many I plan to become a bartender, and perhaps a massage therapist to create decent revenue until I makeup my mind further, but yet I am undecided. I hope to find a job where I can be near my friends and make enough money to support myself and take care of those who I care about. Guess a lot of people have that familiar dream fall apart before their eyes.
My sister wishes to use her computer, and her apartment means her rules. So I'll try and update this soon, adding a proper title and a music video of course. Farewell for now.
[[Gotta Come Up With A Movie Clip]]
Monday, January 4, 2010
Hold Onto Chance..
Today the year is 2010. So far we have come...so far indeed...lots has changed, almost too much to recap. Marquise left the 3rd to go off to boot camp for the National Guard. But before he left he helped me out, whenever I was having a rough day at school and just wanted to go crazy, he was there to calm me down and cheer me up. Just as I was there for him when he needed someone to talk to. That is just something I wont ever forget, and I know I am going to miss him a lot.
In the last couple weeks life has taken a turn I wasn't really expecting. Tuesday (December 29th, 2009) Marquise showed up to work to give me a hug, and with him he had his friend Matthew. I was busy taking down giant poinsettia decorations, and Marquise helped me out. So did Matt, he took the giant flower, and in the funniest way tried to help me down from the table I stood on. They left shortly after that, but I was texting Marquise and one thing lead to another and Marquise gave me Matt's number and Matt my number. By the end of the night Matt had texted me, first thing said was: "Hello my name is Matthew, I was the dude that took the large flower thing from u today. Thats all i can think of as the first thing to say to u." That was at 9:04pm Dec 29th 2009.
The next day, as things would come for a turn I was hanging out with my friend Jesse, and was invited to go see a movie in Niles with some people. These people formed a group of six....Marquise, Morgan, Matthew, his brother Michael, Jesse, and myself. After we saw Sherlock Holmes we went to Pizza Hut, and it was a lot of fun. The way home I was trailing them in my car, for I didn't know my way around the roads we traveled on. They would always go through lights on yellow and I'd always stop since they would turn red. But on one such light, it turned red for me and I went through it. When doing so Matt in the car in front of me opened the window and gave me the thumbs up. That day was a good day. We of course texted that night, and too much was on his mind to go to sleep...
The next day, it was the 31st. The very last day in 2009. Marquise and Matt of course were hanging out and had a party to go to at 10:00, so they came to my house. And hung out in my bedroom after enjoying a pizza I made. It was a lot of fun...and I got hugs from them both. I even walked them out to their car in my socks, even with the snow on the ground. I remember Matt taking his one shoe off for me to wear. I opened the car door for him and said something silly like "Your car madam". It was fun to hang out with people that makes me happy. So after that I curled up in bed, and was taxting Matt some, then when it got around to 11:55pm I got out of bed and watched the ball drop consuming some Welch's Sparkling Grape Juice. And shortly after the new year began, my phone rang and it was Matthew wanting to wish me a Happy Hanukkah since no one ever says that and he wants to bring it back haha. We talked some, and I really enjoyed it...He's a really sweet guy, and I look forward to getting to know him more.
Lastly on the 2nd, Marquise and Matt stopped by my house very late at night to say goodbye before MF left for Lansing. Marquise only stayed a little while giving me some hugs. I will miss him and look forward to his return so we can all hang out again.
Matt stayed a bit longer, but just in the kitchen with all the lights off, for my father was fast asleep and I didn't wish to wake him. We hugged, and had a little hand puppet fight. He makes me smile...but who knows what tomorrow will bring. For all I know is I have half a year of school to go until break, and when my break comes I look forward to hopefully seeing more of Matt.
"Jars" By Chevelle
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zsyg_KDAhoI
In the last couple weeks life has taken a turn I wasn't really expecting. Tuesday (December 29th, 2009) Marquise showed up to work to give me a hug, and with him he had his friend Matthew. I was busy taking down giant poinsettia decorations, and Marquise helped me out. So did Matt, he took the giant flower, and in the funniest way tried to help me down from the table I stood on. They left shortly after that, but I was texting Marquise and one thing lead to another and Marquise gave me Matt's number and Matt my number. By the end of the night Matt had texted me, first thing said was: "Hello my name is Matthew, I was the dude that took the large flower thing from u today. Thats all i can think of as the first thing to say to u." That was at 9:04pm Dec 29th 2009.
The next day, as things would come for a turn I was hanging out with my friend Jesse, and was invited to go see a movie in Niles with some people. These people formed a group of six....Marquise, Morgan, Matthew, his brother Michael, Jesse, and myself. After we saw Sherlock Holmes we went to Pizza Hut, and it was a lot of fun. The way home I was trailing them in my car, for I didn't know my way around the roads we traveled on. They would always go through lights on yellow and I'd always stop since they would turn red. But on one such light, it turned red for me and I went through it. When doing so Matt in the car in front of me opened the window and gave me the thumbs up. That day was a good day. We of course texted that night, and too much was on his mind to go to sleep...
The next day, it was the 31st. The very last day in 2009. Marquise and Matt of course were hanging out and had a party to go to at 10:00, so they came to my house. And hung out in my bedroom after enjoying a pizza I made. It was a lot of fun...and I got hugs from them both. I even walked them out to their car in my socks, even with the snow on the ground. I remember Matt taking his one shoe off for me to wear. I opened the car door for him and said something silly like "Your car madam". It was fun to hang out with people that makes me happy. So after that I curled up in bed, and was taxting Matt some, then when it got around to 11:55pm I got out of bed and watched the ball drop consuming some Welch's Sparkling Grape Juice. And shortly after the new year began, my phone rang and it was Matthew wanting to wish me a Happy Hanukkah since no one ever says that and he wants to bring it back haha. We talked some, and I really enjoyed it...He's a really sweet guy, and I look forward to getting to know him more.
Lastly on the 2nd, Marquise and Matt stopped by my house very late at night to say goodbye before MF left for Lansing. Marquise only stayed a little while giving me some hugs. I will miss him and look forward to his return so we can all hang out again.
Matt stayed a bit longer, but just in the kitchen with all the lights off, for my father was fast asleep and I didn't wish to wake him. We hugged, and had a little hand puppet fight. He makes me smile...but who knows what tomorrow will bring. For all I know is I have half a year of school to go until break, and when my break comes I look forward to hopefully seeing more of Matt.
"Jars" By Chevelle
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zsyg_KDAhoI
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Cause I Feel Like Such An Insomniac
It's been a little while since I last typed down the things that are in my head. I've been working a lot, enjoying some of my co-workers company more than others. I've gone to the beach with Leigha and her son Aidyn, visited a local Pizza Hut with those two plus little Casey, gone on a beach walk Marquise, the fair with Leigha, Aidyn, Rob, Joelin, and Austin.
I've never been a big fan of children but I just enjoy spending time with little Aidyn, he's only three but so sweet and adorable. He doesn't say much but sometimes people don't need to say anything.
Probably the most relaxing time I've had in a long time was when I went to the beach with M.F. we just walked the shoreline and just talked about everything, then eventually we sat down and talked some more, watched the sunset and he gave me the best backrub I've ever had. It was just what I really needed. I think he's probably going to become a good friend of mine, he's very easy to talk to and get along with.
Amusing time at the fair was when I ran into my ex and seemed to have made him jealous by walking side by side with Rob, see Rob is 25 years old, but looks about 30. Oh the joys of having people who care about you, and like spending time with you.
Today I am trying to rush through some summer reading...I have like four books to read and journals to write all in less than two weeks to complete. I'm starting to feel the stress but I have confidence that I will finish it all in time for my Jr school year to begin.
On a side note I'm back to not being able to sleep...last time I slept soundly was after working eight hours and that day at the beach with Marquise. I wish someone would please take me away from here...
"Fireflies" By Owl City
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aI4JLa0hbUw
I've never been a big fan of children but I just enjoy spending time with little Aidyn, he's only three but so sweet and adorable. He doesn't say much but sometimes people don't need to say anything.
Probably the most relaxing time I've had in a long time was when I went to the beach with M.F. we just walked the shoreline and just talked about everything, then eventually we sat down and talked some more, watched the sunset and he gave me the best backrub I've ever had. It was just what I really needed. I think he's probably going to become a good friend of mine, he's very easy to talk to and get along with.
Amusing time at the fair was when I ran into my ex and seemed to have made him jealous by walking side by side with Rob, see Rob is 25 years old, but looks about 30. Oh the joys of having people who care about you, and like spending time with you.
Today I am trying to rush through some summer reading...I have like four books to read and journals to write all in less than two weeks to complete. I'm starting to feel the stress but I have confidence that I will finish it all in time for my Jr school year to begin.
On a side note I'm back to not being able to sleep...last time I slept soundly was after working eight hours and that day at the beach with Marquise. I wish someone would please take me away from here...
"Fireflies" By Owl City
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aI4JLa0hbUw
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